When Two Become Three!!

I'm back.

I’ve really missed blogging and interacting with you all, but I needed some time away to clear my head and just focus on being healthy, calm and happy. I do apologise for just shutting it down without as much as even an explanation.

I decided that now was the perfect time to come back to the blogging world, and it is the perfect time to share with you all my happiest news yet –

I am currently 16 weeks pregnant!

I know, who would have thought?!

Honestly, I feel like all of the kind emails that I received after my post detailing my frustration whilst on Clomid really helped me relax and see the brighter side of life.  I cannot tell you all how much I appreciate those emails, tweets and messages that I received.  To receive such lovely comforting words from strangers is a strange yet amazing thing.

I stopped blogging because my hormones got the best of me and I was finding myself feeling sad and stressed out by comments I was receiving, and things that were happening in real life which related directly to this blog.  Now that my hormones are in check, well - kind of, and I am going to be moderating all comments from now on, which seems rather painful, I am hoping to stay on track.

I didn't close the blog in order to keep my pregnancy a secret, I would have loved to have told you all straight away - as any of my loyal readers know, I am a pretty open book. 
I am sure that a number of you clued on via tweets and pictures I would post on instagram anyway.

Finding out that I was pregnant was a surreal feeling to say the least.

On Friday 6 July, I was aware that my period was 2 days late but didn't think much of it to be honest.  Women have always told me “When you are pregnant, you will know” but apart from my period being late, I had no other signs.  I cannot tell you how many months I had thought that I had symptoms, only to get my period in a few days and feel that slap in the face of disappointment.

I went to my local chemist to stock up on some necessities in preparation for when it arrived and picked up a Clear Blue Digital pregnancy test whilst I was at it, even though I knew I had about 30 at home. What can I say? I am a hoarder.

Once I got home, I peed on the stick and then walked away from the bathroom. After you get so many negatives, you don't hang around waiting for the result to show because you know it will be negative anyway.

I got changed and then about 5 minutes later remembered the test so went back to the bathroom and nearly fell over when the display read 'Pregnant, 2-3 weeks’. Surely not, I must have left the stick for too long.

I waited ten minutes, drinking as much water as I could despite my bladder feeling full from excitement and used another test from another brand – low and behold it said Pregnant too.

After running around the apartment, which is no easy feat considering how small it is, and screaming to myself, I tried to ring The Husband before remembering that he was at his End of Financial Year party.  I messaged him and asked him what time he would be home and that I would be waiting up for him.  He replied that he would be late, and not to wait up.

I rushed down to the news agency at Melbourne Central and pretty much purchased all of the glitter pens, card stock and poster paper that they had in stock and made this big poster. In my excitement of making it, I didn’t write ‘Boy OR girl’, I just wrote ‘Boy Girl’ haha.

The Husband came home hours later and woke me up to see what was going on, I told him to look behind the couch and come back to me.  He came back holding the poster with a look of disbelief on his face. We were so excited. I don’t think excited is even the right word actually.

He asked me if I already knew the gender as my 'Boy Girl' had confused him. My bad.

Needless to say, excitement was radiating through our apartment that night, and it hasn’t stopped since.

The next day we trotted off to the doctors where I peed on yet another stick and the doctor stood at the sink examining it for 20 minutes before The Husband blurted out “WELL?! Is she or isn’t she?!”, it was then that the doctor admitted he had left his glasses at home and could not read the result. There were definitely two lines on the test but I had a blood test that day also and our amazing news was confirmed.
It was very early, only 4 weeks and 2 days, but definitely pregnant!

Of course, I wanted to tell everyone immediately but we waited for roughly 13 weeks to tell majority of people, bar best friends and family.

I had no intentions of ever announcing it on Facebook as I was trying to have dinner with all of my close friends and tell them in person, but that got expensive and time consuming very quickly - I randomly decided to one day and I definitely do not regret it – a simple “The Husband and I are looking forward to welcoming our first child into the world in early March 2013” did the trick. The love that we received was fantastic!

The Husband definitely wants me to mention this, but it goes without saying that I have not touched a drop of alcohol since falling pregnant and that all the photos of cocktails and champagnes on Instagram, blog posts etc have actually been mocktails or somebody else’s drinks.  I was so careful about what I ate in Bali, hence the thousand toasted sandwiches and pizzas, ha.

I haven’t really craved anything odd, but I did crave Hommus in the early weeks and then cheese on toast and hot fries for the remainder.  The smell of meat and coffee is enough to make me sick.

I am due March 11, which just happens to be Labour Day – what a cruel joke that is. I take comfort knowing that people rarely give birth on their due date though!

We are not going to find out the gender of our baby, but I am driving my self insane over this decision.

I stare at the scan photos wondering if that is a little doodle or hooha that I can see!

I had these photos taken by Brooke from For The Love Photography and thought it would be a nice little memory to have, before I get too big. I am pretty sure that I will get big as I popped out at 7.5 weeks - mortifying!!

Plus, better to have some cute photos for this post rather than my standard dirty mirror shot.

I'm not sure what was so funny, perhaps the security at Luna Park not liking us being there with out gigantor balloons.

It's good to be back and to be able to share my news with you is even better!

Yellow Jacket, Clomid, Mexican & Stuff.

I only blogged one last week. Sorry about that.

I’ve been in a bit of a funk really. I started some new medication and it really took it out of me.

I’m usually pretty upbeat and my glass is always half full but I feel like it is slowly emptying.

Whenever someone asks me “what is taking you so long to get pregnant” or “When are you planning on having children”, I feel the heat rise up through my body and my face gets red and I feel like spitting venom out. All I can say is “when the time is right” and hope that shuts them up.

The side effects of my medication that I have had were chronic headaches, one night it was so bad that whenever I lay my head down I was yelping in pain and the nurofen did nothing. The Husband thought I was having a brain aneurism. I had to take the next day off work as it was still really bad and I had no sleep. It hurt to move.

I’ve also had terrible hot flushes. One hot flush was so bad that I put my head in the fridge at work. I was literally dripping with sweat, red all over and generally going insane. That was my worst one so far, but during the night I tend to get little heat flushes and then go back to freezing. I cannot win.

The most annoying side effects has probably been that I have been highly emotional. I was watching I Am Legend (which I have watched 10000 times) and bawled my eyes out during it, which is unusual for me, and then was left feeling quite anxious and apprehensive about what was going to come next so badly that I had to turn off the TV and go to bed. I’m never normally like this!

I wrote this and then I deleted it.

I must have deleted and rewrote it 4 times before saving the post, closing the page and considering whether or not to post it over night.

I decided that I should post it because I have never held back on this blog before.

I know that I should not be embarrassed about it, and I am sure there are lots of other women out there who go through this and have nobody to talk to, but I cant help but be embarrassed by it. I’m a young girlwomanthing, I wont lie, I thought I would get pregnant within months.

I’m taking clomid which is fertility medication to help me ovulate. Apparently I don’t ovulate enough to get pregnant or some crap like that.

It was pretty disheartening after having all of my progesterone blood tests done and my doctor told me that not only did I have cysts on my ovaries, PCO but that I was also not ovulating and therefore would not be falling pregnant without some help.

I stood on Bourke Street in the city and cried outside the doctors surgery for ages. I rang The Husband and told him and he said that it was good news, not bad news. If I didn’t find this out now then who knows how long we would have tried to no avail.

I changed doctors early this year after my normal GP told me he thought that I was six weeks pregnant in December. I wasn’t. Thanks dude. Way to not do a blood test, and throw out predications like that without anything to back it up except for an absent period.

Anyway, I haven’t told that many people that I am on clomid so to all of my friends and family who are reading this, sorry if I haven’t told you and you think that I should have. Its all out there now.

In the end, so many women have fertility issues and lots of women can not get pregnant at all so I feel like I shouldn’t be complaining, and I should be considering them, but I am allowed to feel a little bit lost too. If you are having/have had fertility issues, I really hope that this doesn’t come across as insensitive or moaning too much, I really don’t want it to be like that.

I just need a little bit of luck on my side. 

So, the moral of this story is, keep your fingers crossed that it works and gets the job done!

In brighter news, I got a new jacket from Zara and it is freaking amazing. I have already worn it every day since I got it.

How could you not love it?! It is yellow for crying out loud!

You had better believe that I will be buying it in every colour that I see.

I’m still wearing my Zara Childrens Cardigan, don’t worry

I headed to Miss Fox on Friday to get my eyebrows and mustache threaded (it still hurts like hell) and after Victoria heard me whining about my skin and how I have given up on it, and life, she whisked me upstairs for a peel.

I told you I have gotten in a funk. I’m glad I’m back on the peel bandwagon again though, they really are fantastic.

My pimples are just spreading and multiplying and have even moved into my hair. WHY?!

This blue light contractions shows up oil and all that other grossness.

I hope you are not eating when you see this.

And before I get the obligatory ‘you should be thankful for you skin, some people have NO skin’ comment, everything is relative and if I want to complain about it, I damn well will. You really don’t have to read it. This is a very complaint centred post.

My skin is looking rather glowy after the peel, and it didn’t even hurt. Success. 

My friend Sam has started her own candle making business, called Coast – Natural Soy Wax Candles! I’m all about supporting small businesses, and friends, so thought I would share the love on here.

I ordered this Coconut & Lime candle ($25).

My Coconut & Lime candle is sitting on my desk at work, and it is omitting the most amazing smell even though it has not been lit yet! People are walking past and licking their lips I tell you. 

You can buy them on the Coast Facebook page, HERE  

I tried to be fancy and use rhinestones on my Dior – Plaza manicure but it was a fail. 

I went to Senoritas with cotton socks instead of going to boxing last week. Just how I like it. 

Essie – Fiji.

Standard pastel pink but it takes 4 coats to look good. Mine is a streaky mess. 

The Husband and I went to see Dark Shadows on Friday night and I really enjoyed it.

He fell asleep about 10 minutes into it and as were stuck in the third front row, I had my head on his shoulder so I could look up at the screen comfortably. At one point his head kind of lolled around and I whispered “you can rest your head on mine” as I thought that would be more comfortable for him. He snapped back something in gibberish. Maybe it was Serbian, I am not sure but it sounded like he was speaking in tongues. Weird.

He maintains that he just said “shhhhh” but let me tell you, he was a freak.

Speaking of freaks, Johnny Depp is awesome. The end of the movie was too weird for me though. 

2 coats of Sephora by OPI – Opening Night

1 coat of OPI – DS Magic

1 accent nail of China Glaze – Snowglobe.

I was intending on wearing my new blue dress to dinner this night so thought I would go all Beyonce on y’all and rock a blue nail.

Of course, we had Mothers Day on Sunday.

I took my mum out to China Bar, along with Joseph, Emma and Grant. The service was not very good this time as they were crazy packed but the food was still good! 

How weird is that guy in the back. He has a proper cone head. I’m impressed. 

My China Glaze polishes arrived from OzSale.com.au last Friday. Yipppeeeee.

I got Snowglobe & Nova. I was obviously holding back.  

On Saturday, that man that I so fondly call The Husband came home with a new coffee machine, a pod one.

The only issue with this is that we received a coffee machine as a wedding gift and have not used it yet. So now we have 2 coffee machines. The pod one is super easy though, which is what I like to hear.

Apparently the lady in Myer made him a cup of coffee and then he felt obliged to buy it, or something like that.

I’m happy, now I don’t need to trek down the street to get him a coffee on the weekend.

Well, okay, I’ve only done that twice, I usually say No. But still! 

Two blog posts so far this week. I’m already on top of my game!!