Turning 25.

I recently turned 25.

I'm in my (hopefully) second quarter of life now and the last couple of years I feel like I have done so much, but doing so much also means that the years fly by.

Turning 25 reminds me of a questionnaire that we were sent for our 5 year high school reunion (which never went ahead by the way thanks to dismal RSVP's - these days if you want to see who has a great job, who has gained weight etc you just log on to facebook) which asked the big looming question:

What have you achieved?

I complained to The Husband that I had achieved nothing. nada. zilch. Mind you, this was 2011.

What the hell was I going to write? So, I wrote that I had achieved becoming more awesome.

The Husband was annoyed at me for complaining that I had done nothing except drop out of my Food Science course, worked as a receptionist and just plodded along. He wanted to be mentioned in my achievements, of course.

What would I write now? I would write that not only was I married to a loving husband but that we had created a beautiful little human and I got to spend my days with her.

I honestly cannot think of a better achievement, for me personally. Some may not see that as an achievement but everyone is different.

Anyway, I digress. 

The morning of my 25th birthday, I woke at 7:30am like every other morning and went and got Nelly and we sung happy birthday together. Her singing is more like yelling in another language but the thought was there, I am sure. 

The Husband woke up, took Nelly from me and they both came back with Nelly holding a brown bag.

I honestly thought that I would not get a gift, after all I had not asked for anything and did not want anything. 

Much to The Husbands annoyance, I opened my card first. I always do.

It would appear that not only has Nelly gotten much better at drawing and writing, but that she also got her licence and took her pink cozy coupe out into the big smoke and picked me up a present.

She's a good kid!

For Christmas I had asked for a new wallet. I wanted a Fossil wallet that had penguins all over it, but I can only assume that The Husband and Nelly did not approve of it as it never turned up in my stocking.

Instead, this beautiful Pochette Milla MM turned up on my birthday. I must say, I do like it better than the penguin wallet. A lot better.

I am using this instead of a purse, it's the right size for cash, cards, phone and car keys and not as bulky. 

My lovely Mother In Law sent me these gorgeous flowers, 25 red roses for each year that I had been alive and lillies for her favorite (and only) grandchild.  

What could make my birthday even more perfect? The arrival of Nellys Thug Life snap back. HAHAHA. 

I know, I know. I just couldn't resist. 

Seriously. Look at it. 

The kid hates wearing hats though so it took a scrunched up envelope to get her to leave it on her head long enough to take a photo.

Her hat is from Little Peeps by the way. 

Body after baby, or lack thereof.

When I was younger I used to tell people "when I get pregnant, I'm going to put on so much weight and I am going to love it" and I stayed pretty damn true to that statement.

I was never going to do this blog post as I know that it will just open me up to negative comments about being fat and unhealthy, but that stuff doesn't matter. What matters is other mums knowing that it's okay to be a bit plump, there is nothing to be ashamed of - I promise.

I also didn't want to buy into the fact that the world is obsessed with weight and image, but here I am.

This will be long winded and may not make sense but I am just going to publish it and so be it.

This photo was taken on our honeymoon in 2011 and I remember thinking that my thighs were too big in the photo. Damn, girl. I would love those thighs right about now. 

Whilst trying to get pregnant, my doctor suggested that it might help if I put on a couple of kilos.
She said "Maryanne, you weigh 53kg soaking wet - it won't hurt to try it" and I put on a few kilos and fell pregnant - let's not forget that I was also on clomid and I am sure that that is what actually helped but never mind, I was happy to do anything to get pregnant. I would have robbed a bank if I thought it would help.

When I was pregnant I lived disgustingly close to a Kennys Bakery chain and if you have never been to Kennys you will not be aware of the fact that they make delicious custard croissants.

You can thank me later.

Anyway, five days a week I would walk into Kennys and they had my custard filled croissant WAITING FOR ME.

I am not kidding you. It was waiting for me, just like that. In a bag and all. The staff greeted me like an old friend, not just a pudgy pregnant lady who had a thing for their baked goods.

I would walk the couple of blocks to my tram on Swanston Street while devouring my croissant, the powdered sugar falling on my chest and bump like the first drop of snow.

I kept this delicious little secret from pretty much everyone I knew, as I knew that they would just tell me that it was going to catch up to me. It did. It caught up at about 30 weeks when I just exploded.

Kennys wasn't the only thing that I ate obviously, I ate everything in sight.
Oh, you have food? Good - give me some.
Oh, you've had enough? No worries, I'll finish it.

I told my obstetrician how much weight I was gaining and he replied "why are you confessing to me? I am not a priest" and that was good enough for me. If he was happy with my health, and more importantly, my unborn childs health, then so was I. 

The above photo was taken a week or two before Nelly made her debut into life (The Husband just saw this photo and said "There is Nelly!!!!!!! Hi Nelly!!!") and at this stage I had gained a tiny whopping amount of 40 KILOS. 

For those of you playing overseas, that's roughly 88 pounds or 6 stone.

And you know what? I freaking loved doing it.

I ate whatever the hell I wanted. I quit going to preggybellies when my legs hurt too much to walk the 4 blocks because of all the extra weight I was carrying on my 160cm frame. 

Do I recommend nearly doubling your body weight? Of course not. I recommend that you eat well and exercise and put minimum weight on, it will make your life after baby so much easier. 

Do I own the fact that I put on so much weight? Damn straight. I'm not proud of it but I am not ashamed. I did it, and it is done. 

In fact, I have made many mums feel better when they have told me in secrecy that "oh my god I put on neatly 15kg when I was pregnant, how terrible is that?!" and I sit back, puff my fake cigar and say "gather round and ye shall hear a tale of a woman who gained 40kg".

The above photo was taken the day after I gave birth. I had just been fitted with a tubigrip thing (which did nothing for me) and I remember being quite impressed with how much room little 6 pound 15oz Nelly had taken up in my belly, her comfortable home for the past 42 weeks.

I asked The Husband how pregnant I was in the above photo and he said 8 months. Hmmm.

This photo was taken the day that I came home from hospital, when Nelly was 5 days old. 

As you can see, it is totally normal to still have a belly and look 8 months pregnant. 

Lots of women can walk out with a completely flat belly and that is from genetics, good health and exercise during pregnancy or just sheer luck. 

I wont lie, I have found myself a little bit envious of these svelte women while I tuck my flab into my jeans. 

It's not healthy to live your life envious of others though, you just need to count your blessings and remember how lucky you are.

The above photo was taken in Vanuatu when Nelly was 3 months and I shuddered when I saw it. I literally shuddered.

It took me quite awhile to get used to the fact that my body had changed. I no longer had a big cute belly that looked delightful in fitted clothing, I now had a flabby belly that moved on it's own and looked terrible in fitted clothes and even worse in baggy clothes.

There was no happy medium.

I cried while trying on jeans. I bought a baggy jumper and subsequently felt like a tent.

I didn't know what to do. Complaining didn't seem to make the weight fall off, and I was out of ideas.

My doctor gave me the go ahead to start exercising at 6 weeks and The Husband, who never said a harsh word about my changing body type, got me a gym membership and I went twice. Just twice.

As is well documented here, Nelly did not like to sleep so I would walk and walk and walk and walk and she would sleep. The walking is the only thing that helped me shift the weight.

Everyone said "oh it will fall off while breastfeeding" but for me that was the complete opposite as in the 3 weeks when Nelly was about 6 months old and completely formula fed, I lost the bulk of my weight.

I don't know why. I don't know how. Do not assume that breastfeeding will mean you lose all of your excess baby weight, as each person is so different.

I put a call out on my facebook page on what questions people would like to hear answered and there are quite a few so here we go:-

Belinda asked: How did you go about finding breastfeeding appropriate clothing?

I found that the easiest option for me was to wear a singlet underneath normal tops, and to pull the top up and the singlet down rather than to buy expensive nursing clothes. 

I really didn't want to spend too much money on buying clothes that I would hopefully not fit into within 6 months time. 

I find that if I can buy something with a v neck or some stretch in it then it will hopefully be okay to just pull to the side, but this can lead to a lot of clothing being warped.

Cat asked: How did you make time for exercise with a newborn?

All of my exercise was incidental, purely because I didn't have a car for the first 3 months and was forced to walk everywhere not to mention the fact that Nelly only slept in the pram - this was a blessing in disguise for dropping some weight actually.

By the time that The Husband got home, I just had no energy left and the last place I wanted to be was at the gym. 

Angeline asked: Did you lose loads of hair after giving birth and while breastfeeding?

Not at all actually. I'm still waiting with anticipation for this to happen as everyone has scared the crap out of me with stories about waking up practically bald.

Nelly is bald, we don't need two bald women in the family. 

Shelle asked about: The 24 hours after giving birth, learning to breastfeed and getting into a healthy indoor/outdoor routine with baby.

*The first 24 hours were amazing to me. I had created this tiny little muffin and I just wanted to smother her with kisses and smother The Husband with kisses as he obviously played a part in creating our perfect love bug. It was also a complete blur. You are in a state of discomfort, it hurts to sit down and the midwives are coming in with frozen condoms and if you are like me, you have no idea what to do with them. They are also asking you about bowel movements and rolling you over to check stitches - I would have preferred that they did this without The Husband around but what can you do. 

*The first time Nelly latched on, shortly after birth, I yelped and told my mum that she had teeth. I swear, the kid had teeth. That shit hurt. Your nipples will crack and they may bleed.

You will get very used to everyone seeing your breasts and poking you and squeezing this and that but it does get easier and if it doesn't there are other options.

*My advice would be to leave the house every day. No matter what. Go for a walk to the end of the street, make friends with your local coffee dude and just walk. Nothing is as bad in the beautiful daylight (rain or shine) as it seems when you are cooped up inside with a yelling baby.

It will do you both good, I promise.

Roxanne asked: Do you fart or poo when giving birth? How much do your boobs grow?

Well. Yes. This is the only way that I knew that I was pushing in the correct place thanks to my epidural. The midwife is ready for it, don't be embarrassed and it will be gone before you can blink.

Boobs. My boobs grew heaps. They still fluctuate from DD to F depending on my breastfeeding pattern. It's a pain in the ass.

Maria (and Roxanne and Leah) asked: Do you have stretchmarks? Do you have a saggy belly or has it gone back to normal? Tactics for losing weight?

I am riddled with them. On my tummy, on my hips, on my breasts and across my thighs. They started off angry, brandishing pitchforks, but they are now silver and slightly more serene. 

I used everything under the sun to prevent them but hello! They came anyway. 

I do have a saggy bit, it is under my underwear line though so I can't complain too much. I have no doubt that clean eating and exercise would tighten it up though. 

Joey (my brother) asked: Will you ever stop blaming Nelly and accept that it was cake that made you fat?

To which I say, I love delicious cake.

Heidi asked: What about cellulite?

I have always had lots of cellulite on my legs and it fluctuates with my size. I know that muscle building will lessen it, I just need to put it into action and get of my robust ass.

Courtney asked: Do your lady parts go back to normal?

Haha, yes of course. Straight after birth, you are swollen to a ridiculous point but it goes down rapidly. 

Joanna asked: Did the initial weight fall of easily?

Not at all, I ate like a maniac when I first started breastfeeding and it has been a long road.

Ulrike asked: What about the hips?! Do they ever go back to normal?!

I think they go back to normal and are just currently hidden under a layer of fat! It's my upper waist that I am worried about as that is definitely thicker, argh.

Shan asked: How about the mental challenges of changing body, opposed to the physical. Coming to terms with a different shape etc. 

At the start I found it really difficult. 

I cried while clothes shopping, I yelled at The Husband and told him I was a fat beast and how could he look at me?! He replied by telling me that I was beautiful, I had just had a baby and he loved looking at me. He never judged me or made me feel like crap.

I was so angry that none of my clothes fit me, the maternity ones looked stupid and pre-pregnancy were way too small. The Husband told me to go and buy a new wardrobe but of course shopping was just a disaster and I had worse self esteem after that than beforehand. 

I have absolutely no doubt that had I have eaten better and maintained exercise that I would have been in a better place but what's done is done and you should never regret what you had fun doing. 

This photo was taken on 9 November and I think I only had about 10 kilos left to go.

This, because this post is nothing without my little ratbag in it.

I took this photo yesterday. I didn't even run it through instagram, I wanted it to have zero editing. I am actually quite impressed with the fact that it has tightened back up quite a bit with zero effort from me. 

My belly button is a freak of nature. It has been stretched out, the hole where my belly button ring (from 10 years back) split open and it is riddled with stretch marks. 

My linea nigra still has not completely vanished. I hate this line, I really do. Nelly has a little linea nigra too though and that makes me like mine more. She also has the same birthmark as I do on my right hip and a freckle in the palm of her hand like mine. 

I have stretch marks everywhere. They appeared one day and invited all their buddies to the party. 

The skin below my underwear line is a bit puckered and loose. It's not pretty. 

Everyone thinks that they are entitled to comment on my weight, including my neighbor and my coffee shop dude. I think that's weird. 

Is it okay for me to comment that they look a bit fat? I don't think so. 

I was asked when Nelly was 6 weeks old if I was pregnant, despite that person knowing Nelly was 6 weeks old. When I said no, he didn't believe me and just kept pointing to my belly. Awkward. It happens to the best of us. 

This belly, that has nearly shrunk back to 'normal' housed my amazing daughter for 42 weeks. 

This belly, it rippled and shuddered when she moved around. 

This belly, it had elbows and feet poke out of it. 

This belly, it was massaged and kissed by The Husband every night as he spoke to our unborn daughter. 

This belly, is as equally amazing as the belly of every other woman who has ever grown a child, no matter on how they gave birth or at what stage. 

There is nothing brave about speaking about putting on weight and showing a flabby belly, because these things are nothing to be ashamed of. I don't care what anybody says. 

If anyone wants to leave questions/comments in the comment section, please do. I will answer them all and hopefully other women will give their two bobs worth and advice also. 

The moral of this long winded story? You might get plump. I did. It's okay.

Pocket Balls give away!!!

Pocket Balls are currently holding a great giveaway, and there are not many entrants so far so you are in with a killer chance of winning.

What's in the prize pack?

1 x MicroCurrent Facial Rejuvenator 1 x Travel Pack (Instant Reusable Heat Pack, Bottle of Facial Hydration Spray (50ml), Menthol / Mint Lip Balm and Re-hydrating Cleansing Cloths)1 x Neck & Shoulder heat pack 1 x Medium heat pack The full set of Pocket Balls!!

This giveaway is valued at $250!!

To enter, simply 'Like' the Pocket Balls Facebook page and share the page with your friends! 

The winner will be drawn at the end of January, 2014! Too easy.

If you would like to purchase the Pocket Balls or anything else you have seen above just head over to Take 5 & Energize or Pocket Balls .

The $2 Peacock Chair

My mum picked up this peacock style chair (I'm not sure it is a peacock chair as it doesn't have the feather design thing but for my sake lets just call it a peacock chair) for the bargain price of $2 at a country op shop.

Yes, $2.

She could have bought two apple pies from McDonalds for that!

I have always envied people who pick up awesome furniture on the side of the road and then I go to the farm and what do I see sitting in a lonely corner, this kids size chair in need of some tender loving care.

I think I am the person to give it that TLC.

Mum was quick to hand it over and give me her blessing to paint it what ever colour I saw fit. 

When I came home with the chair, The Husband was not impressed with it at all but when he sees it in its new glory he is going to love it. 

I headed to Bunnings with Blithely Unaware and her two main squeezes, we ate sausages and they were all "you need to sand the chair, it needs to be sanded" but lets be honest here, that kind of effort was never going to be reached by me. Ever. 

We decided that yes, spray paint would be the less effort and then it was just choosing the colour which had me in a pickle.

I had already turned to my Facebook Page and asked everyone's opinion as I was originally thinking yellow but the people wanted turquoise and you have to give the people what they want.

That and the fact that there was limited colours to choose from, but still. 

I used one can of Rust-oleum Painter's Touch in Gloss Seaside ($10.95) and probably should have laid down more paper and worn gloves and shoes but I cant be perfect all the time. 

The paint came off my hands eventually but my outside tiles now have a fetching tint of blue to them.

As I had no cushion I thought I would have to buy one from etsy or eBay but I spotted this Esprit (Sahara Sun) cushion in Myer and thought it would be perfect, plus the double sided option gives me room to play.

It was tagged at $50 but came down to $35 which was a pleasant surprise at the register. 

I've only given it one coat for the time being as I ran out of spray paint but it looks pretty damn good if I do say so myself. 

The cushion is a bit too big but that's fine, the more cushion for Nellys tooshin' the better. 

Now I have the DIY bug and I want to paint everything that I can see. It's lucky that I am out of paint or my house would look like it was under the sea. 

Of course, what would this post be without a photo of Nelly sitting on her throne?

As these photos were hard to take with Nelly trying to jump out at every chance she got, I will include all the non blurry shots.

It's hard to tell but she has a silk knitted crown on which Cat bought for her when she was just four months old!

"I say Old Chap, be a sport and feed me my grapes".

All in all, the chair is a great success!! 

Our Daily Schedule!

People without kids, this will most likely bore you to tears. I won't be offended if you close the page. It may actually bore everyone to tears but that's okay.

As has been requested in the past, this is my complete daily schedule with Nelly.

These times are to the minute if we are at home. I kid you not, to the minute.

7:30AM  

Time for Nelly to wake up.

               

She usually wakes up on her own between 7 and 7:30 but I won't get her out of her bed until 7:30 as she is happy to just talk to herself in there for awhile and I like to get that extra few minutes of sleep.

As soon as I get her up she comes into bed with us for a nappy change, breastfeed and a play until 8am.

8:00AM 
Play time in the living room and I might have breakfast now, otherwise I will eat at the same time that she does and we will share my food. 

8:30AM

Time for Nelly to have her breakfast which is usually two weetbix made with formula and fruit.

It will take her anywhere from 10 -30 minutes to eat her breakfast and straight after breakfast it's back to play time.

9:15AM

Change nappy, whether it is wet or not (this rule goes for every nappy change you see written here). Now that she is crawling at a rapid rate, nappy time is a hard slog. She loves la on her back and act all placid and calm but will flip as soon as the nappy is off and crawl away as quick as can be so it can take awhile.

9:25AM

Read Story

9:30AM

Bed Time

This is probably the easiest sleep of the day where I do not need to settle her as she goes straight to sleep.

It's now that I make the hard decision on what I am going to do for the next two hours, housework or put my feet up and catch up on all of my shows that are recorded on Foxtel.

I don't need to tell you what I usually choose. I don't really have the TV on during the day if Nelly is awake though as I just don't see the need for it and she gets too distracted from it.

11:30AM 

Wake the kid up. Nappy change. Breastfeed. Play.

If we are going to go for a walk, we do it now and I take a packed lunch for Nelly to eat at the park while we are out. 

12:30PM

Lunch. As with breakfast, this can take anywhere from 10 min to 30 min. Usually also involves redecorating our house with her food. She considers herself quite the artist. 

1:15PM

Change Nappy

1:25PM

Read Story {Keep books short and sweet, the 'that's not my...' are a favorite in our house}

1:30PM

Bed Time!

If she is going to resist any sleep, it's this one and she will resist it with all her might.
We know if she is going to sleep or not within 10 minutes of putting her down. It's possible that I will spend an hour settling her (10 minute intervals) if she is playing up. She never cries though, just grizzles and talks and bangs around.

If she sleeps, this is the two hour break where I will get the housework done since I was a slacker in the morning. 

3:30PM

Time to wake up, nappy change and breastfeed. 

We might go and get the groceries in this wake time if she has actually slept as I am not as fussed if she misses her cat nap, and as she only has maximum 2 hourly wake times it can be a bit impossible to do the grocery shopping any earlier in the day.

She also doesn't have a meal during this wake time as it's a snack period only which she is happy to munch on in the car or trolley. 

We don't have any set times on our schedule between 3:30 and 5PM but if we are at home in time for her catnap it looks like this:

4:50PM 

Change Nappy

4:55PM 

Read Story

5:00PM

Cat Nap Time

If she has actually slept:

6:15PM

Time to Wake Up

If she has just played in her cot:

5:45PM

Time to Get Up

6:15PM

Nappy change

Dinner Time

6:45PM

Bath time

7:00PM

Breastmilk or bottle time

7:25PM

Story Time and check nappy (as nappy only went on at 7PM I won't usually change it unless obviously needing a change)

7:30PM

Bed Time! She will always go straight to sleep now as well, you can practically hear her breathe a sigh of relief. 

10:30PM

Dream Feed.

The Husband usually does this feed but we are going to attempt to phase it out shortly. I'm scared that she won't sleep through the night without it though. Argh.

We wont hear a peep from Nelly until 7am-ish. Thank you Masada. THANK YOU.

Anyway. That's what our standard day looks like.

It also makes it easy for anyone who is babysitting her as they know exactly what to do and when. 

Our Daily Grind

I'm not sure what went wrong with this post, but I wrote it about a fortnight ago so will republish it:

A lot of people ask me 'what do you do all day?' and I always seem to stumble over my answer.

Since her wake times have been cut to two hours since Masada (I'm going to do a follow up post on Masada sooner than later) I often feel like I am house bound.

We wake up and Nelly has her milk feed and then we wait 40 minutes until her solids feed and then by the time that is all over and done with, it's time to wind down and get ready for her next nap.

Since the weather has taken a turn for the better, we tend to go for a walk to the park and shops after her milk feed and I give her the solids feed in her pram at the park. The Joolz tips right up so that she is completely upright which is perfect for eating.

Half a second after I snapped this shot of Nelly loving life on the swing, she started to arch forward and came out under the bar and was making for the ground. I caught her just in time, it was as if I was watching slow motion via the lens of my camera - whoops.

I gave a cursory look around to make sure that the other group of mums playing on the play equipment didn't see me. After all, I was that mum looking at my phone instead of my child.

Well, I was looking at her through the lens while taking a photo but still.

Since Nelly no longer uses a dummy I have found genius ways to use her straps, such as a harness for Sophie.

You have probably noticed the new Uber Kate banner to the right of this post.

Well, I was lucky enough to receive a necklace from them and they will be advertising on this blog for a little bit.

When I sent this photo to The Husband we got into a tiff about why I would have Nelly put on a necklace instead of her first name. I really didn't understand why he cared so much, seriously, what was it to him? Was he going to be wearing it? Nope. 

We went back and forth about it until I discovered that he thought this was a necklace for Nelly, not for me to wear which is why he thought it should say her real name.

Took about 20 messages of me being so confused before I worked it out.

This outfit is a bit frillier than usual but damn it was cute.

I asked a random lady at the park to take a photo of us and Nelly looked on with suspicion.

This dress is awesome. It's $19 from Mix Apparel (AKA Coles) you can find it here  and it would be perfect for maternity wear. Which may or may not have been the main reason I purchased it, for future use.

I wear it all the time, I need to get more as they are so comfortable for around the house and running around. 

Now as you can see, Nelly and I are two peas in a pod when it comes to two things, one being our outfits and the other being our preferences for closing our eyes in photos.

Speaking of maternity wear, I looked after Thomas and Henry a week or so back and took them for a stroll with Nelly strapped to me and they were so, so good.

They kept turning around and singing to her and giggling when she giggled, they are thick as thieves when they are together. It's so nice that Nelly has Thomas, Henry and Ashleigh-Rose around her so often. I can't wait for her to meet Sophia and Rory. 

It makes me positive that I want three children one day. One day.
What age gap do you think is best between children? Do you have siblings that are far or close in age?